It is past 9 pm. Long past bed time for most 4-year old
kids, but my triplets are still not ready for bed. Dinner is over, and now they
have to brush and take a quick body bath and go to bed. I pick up Ramu to brush
his teeth and he is screaming, ‘No..No…NONONO!’ I know he is very sleepy, that
is why the tantrum. He simply doesn’t want to go to bed. He is jerking and
jumping in my arms, he has a bat and a ball in his hands and he wants to play
cricket, now! He wants me to throw the ball. I say no way, and he is getting
louder. ‘Throw the ball, throw the ball’, when I suddenly say- ‘There once
lived a HUGE whale in an ocean (He is quiet all of a sudden, he loves stories),
the whale had two little babies and both of them loved to play cricket (His
eyes are wide now, imagining the scene, and I gently prop him on my lap and
start brushing), but there was a problem- the ball wouldn’t bounce in the ocean
water! Now the whale babies cried and mama whale thought, ‘let me ask the sea
turtle’. She goes to the sea turtle and tells the problem (Brushing done, we
have started the body bath). The turtle agreed to help and she went inside her
house. When she came out she had a ball in her hands. She said ‘this ball will
bounce’, and the baby whales started to play. Younger one threw the ball and in
did bounce in the water(!) and went to the batsman, the elder baby whale, who
hit the ball to the boundary! (We have done the bath, I am dressing him in his
pajamas, he is still imagining) Now what was the ball? It was the baby turtle
with its neck inside the shell! Since the ball hit the hard shell, it did not
hurt, and at the end of the day baby turtle and baby whales became thick
friends and played every day from then on’.
When the story is over he is in bed, and within five minutes
he is sure to fall asleep. By now my little girl Malu has spotted my nail
polish and wants me it put it for her. Only then she would come to brush. Okay,
in two minutes I finish polishing all ten fingernails and she brushes fast (I
do it in quickly and quietly- else the boys also will come running, demanding
that I polish their nails too, right now. That's what happens usually). She
wants a story too, and I tell her one from Panchatanthra while we finish the
bath. Now I need to get my third sweetie pie to brush and he is screaming his
heart out sitting under the staircase demanding to buy a batman suit at this
very moment. (Both Ramu and Malu don’t seem to be aware of the tantrums- Ramu
is about to sleep, and Malu is telling some story to herself, lying on the
bed). No, nothing but the suit can pacify Balu. Still I give a try- depending
on the knowledge that he loves his studies. I say loudly to my mother (so I can
be heard above his screams) – “Mother, can you give five words that start with
‘T’”? Mother is quick to catch up and she starts words. The screams from below
the staircase stopped all of a sudden. Good. After ‘T’, I ask mother to say
words with E’, and lo! Balu comes out saying ‘Elephant’ and laughing. I quickly
grab him and finish the brushing and bathing, while still continuing the word
play. By the time Balu is in bed, I am totally exhausted.
Being a professor of Architecture, I had spent that whole
day attending to students’ design reviews in college, commenting and correcting
their designs. After reaching home, I had spent all the time playing with the
kids and feeding them. Now after my own bath, I can barely move and I sit the
bed and close my eyes. Today is a day
when I used the ‘Sama’ and ‘Dana’ techniques of diplomacy. I am not a supermom.
Far from it. I survive because both my parents, despite their age, take active
part in raising my triplets, and love doing it. I stay sane because my husband
spends most of his after- office hours with the kids, thus relieving me. And
yet I have my days of stress when I yell at my kids, they scream and cry and I
have to threaten them with a stick (my ‘Bheda’ technique). Thankfully I
restrain myself from using the stick (no ‘Danda’), but after the yells and
screams, all of us are tired, and my kids go to sleep teary-eyed, and by the
time I get to bed, I am full of regrets. After all they are kids. If it was one
child, would I lose patience so easily? I ask myself. Wouldn’t I try to pacify
him/ her with all the love and sweet-talk in the world? Because it is three at
a time, I get tired, stressed and end up yelling and shouting.
A small and sweet kiss warms my cheek and I open my eyes.
‘Amma is very tired,’ Malu is whispering to the boys after kissing me. They
also move towards me, kiss me and hug me and instantly fall asleep- Ramu in my
lap, Malu and Balu in each of my arms.
There is a tiny smile on three angelic faces, and I thank and thank God
for all the blessings that He is showering upon us.
